Entering deep into the Silence of my Heart

A few weeks ago I made a decision to go on silent retreat for three days before I head to NM.  I figured I could use the time to sit with the gri#NMhereIcomeef of my final week in NJ: saying goodbye to the church I served for three years, my 9 year old dog Anoukie, my companion and Love and special friends and family.  My heart would be filled with grief, so I booked time to enter into deep Silence, into Stillness and listen.

I am glad I did.  However, just like everything I do I am surprised by what has happened.  My heart is filled with grief.  Tears ran freely on my final day.

But when I entered into silence tears did not come.  I can feel the grief there as a companion.  Yet, all I have wanted to do was weave.  So I picked up my hand loom and spent my first day of silence weaving.  This beauty arrived.

I was drawn to brown.  As I wove I knew the grief was shifting.  The browns were being complimented by color.  Not just any color but ancestral color:  yarns that I recently found left over from my grandmother’s knitting.  The warp itself is ancestral yarn.

When I took the weaving off, flipped it over, and looked I saw a beautiful NM landscape.  Yes, like many of my weavings, I wove it upside down.  The top of the weaving is the bottom of the finished product.  My soul wove together my ancestral line and NM.  I am headed to ancestral Land, not this lifetime’s but previous.   I am going to meet myself across time, across dimensions, across space.

I truly am Weaving my Tapestry of Wholeness as I journey.

 

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